Work Clothes Are Boring - Who's With Me?

It never, and I mean NEVER once occurred to me that I would regret my chosen career path for one main reason: the clothes. I don't actually regret becoming a lawyer, but there are a few things that I never thought would bother me. The main one is that I have to dress like a grown up EVERY DARN DAY. And when I say grown up, I mean BORING. Suits, skirts and sweaters, tights in the winter, uncomfortable shoes. Now, before anyone gets up on a high horse and tells me that there ARE cute professional outfits out there, I know! There are! But I have neither the time, money, nor really, the inclination, to spend acquiring and putting together cute professional outfits. Besides the fact that when one strays from the normal buttoned-up business wear, there is a serious risk of appearing unprofessional. And as much as I hate to admit it, as a woman, I feel compelled to avoid being too sexy, too childish, too outlandish, or otherwise rocking the boat, because I think a lot of the people I work with would see it as a sign that I'm not "serious" enough. Lame. Totally lame and boring! And even if I had enough money to buy all of the Banana Republic suits and silky shirts and cute, but not ridiculous shoes, I would still feel constricted by the uniform.

This is, of course, a pretty minor concern. Lots of people in this country a) don't have any job at all, or b) have jobs that require them to wear (and do!) things I would hate even more. See: Long John Silver's employees. I speak from personal experience when I say that the tri-color polo shirt/duo-color baseball cap, polyblend pants look is also a bit dehumanizing. I know that I'm basically complaining about something that many people would be extremely happy to have as a problem. I just never contemplated when I signed on the law school dotted line that I would be devoting a pretty hefty chunk of my future income to dry cleaning (OMG! so expensive!) and replacing torn tights. (And no, I don't wear pantyhose. I find them altogether TOO demeaning, as an item of clothing. I like tights because they a) don't turn your legs into strange, brown monstrosities, and b) don't (usually) contain a handy "tummy panel," aka "bladder/soul-crushing item designed to cripple you into womanly submission").

So, if any young person out there is considering law school, I urge you to first take a quick gander into your closet. Do you cherish your favorite jeans? Hate high heels with a fiery passion? Love to wear patterns, stripes and garish colors, often at the same time? Do you dread the idea of buttoning yourself into a suit day after day, harnessing your bazoombas down so as not to offend the elderly men who populate your profession, and teetering to and from the printer on heels that give you a Charley horse? RECONSIDER YOUR OPTIONS.

Discovered...

that it is easy to spend 1.5 hours in the gym when you set the TV to "I Used to Be Fat" on MTV. Watching people try to lose 100 pounds is quite motivating!

Also, I feel that it is impossible to NOT be awkward with people in the gym. Either you don't talk at all, which is weird, in such a confined space, or you talk and then they KEEP TALKING while you are sweating and heavy breathing. Also quite awkward. I might just go back to ignoring people.

Brrrrr

6 miles in the snow! Here's the route.

A little hard on the toes in my snow boots, but a very nice walk! Plus, I had my dad with me, so I could chat the whole time. That makes the time go by a lot faster!

Crazy Man

Today I walked:

3.1 miles (no incline) on the treadmill.

Today I observed:

The crazy men who live in my complex and are OBSESSED with weightlifting. Can I just say, it's super awkward to find yourself alone in a room with a man who is GRUNTING LOUDLY and swearing at a MACHINE. If you can't do it without giving yourself a hernia, it seems like maybe you should lower the weights a bit, no? I mean, it doesn't LOOK healthy....

To top it off, I said goodbye (just out of politeness - he had until then failed to even make eye contact) and his voice came out all high-pitched and friendly "TAKE CARE!" (::squeak::). Odd. Very odd.

Half Marathon Training!

I haven't totally abandoned my blog! Well, ok, I suppose I have, for a bit. It's been a crazy year. But now I'm training to walk a half marathon with my friend Kitty! I am very excited! I decided to use my blog as a journal of my training, which officially starts MONDAY! I'm going to follow this plan:



(Credit: marathonwalking.com)

Today's goals:

1) New trainers (Yes, I realize I'm using a German anglicism to refer to sneakers, but I can't help it - it makes me smile!)

2) A nice big mellow walk in the SNOW! Woohoo!

3) Drink lots of water.

I always thought I should start a t-shirt business... (warning - this post might be rude?)

So my friend T and I were SO convinced when we were in high school that we had the BEST ideas for t-shirts and that we would someday become wealthy by selling our highly ironic t-shirts. Our favorite (only?) idea was one that said "Quebec...quois?" It was supposed to be an impression of a snooty French person turning up their nose at Quebecois. Yeah. Not as funny as I remember.

Anyway, I have come up with a new one:

Lupus is like a drunk bastard who carries a big stick.

This is because lupus a) stinks, b) is very unpredictable and c) is wont to hit you over the head and cause you great distress. Just like a stinky drunk bastard might do if wandering the streets carrying a big stick! "Whomp whomp whomp"

Post-edit: T says I should send my immune system to the Betty Ford clinic. Ah, he can still make me laugh!

Meow. (In defense of cats)

I think that having a cat is a little bit like having a baby. Now, I'm not actually comparing raising a cat to raising a human being. That would be like comparing building a bookend with building Grand Central Station. Obviously it's not the same. But consider the following parallels:

a) Cuteness: Both cats and children are very cute. And their cuteness is in an inverse relationship to their age. Now, I love both children and cats of all ages, and thus think they are pretty much all cute, at all times (except when they puke). But even the most cynical cat/child-despising person will probably admit that there is something undeniably adorable about newborn babies and teeny kittens.

b) Warmth. Try this experiment: next time you are cold, find a baby (or a cat), and hold it (preferably a full on snuggle). Now, are you still cold? Then you must have a heart of stone.

c) Poop Duty: I don't really need to explain this one, beyond this observation: were it not for (a) and (b), our willingness to perform (c) would be greatly diminished for both children and cats.

d) Inexplicable Need To Follow You From Room To Room (Which Can Be Aggravating, But Secretly Makes You Feel Special): Obviously I don't have children, but I can imagine that the little "Aw, I'm her favorite Humanoid, because she follows me everywhere! (Or because I feed her, but let's pretend it's because she loves me!" feeling I get from my cat is exponentially greater for parents of humans, even when the creature following them around is dripping snot/salsa/playdough, etc. on their expensive duvet cover.

Anyway, all of this is a long way to say, I love my cat. And just as I do not judge all of you mothers by the Kate Gosselins and Nadya Sulemans of the world, please do not judge me by the 99 cat cat ladies of the world. Some of us are just normal people, who happen to love their furry little bookends.